sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize