Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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