Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
We are two peas in an std pod
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Randomize