Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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