You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
