They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
