He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
