its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize