I'm really into asian looking animals
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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