Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize