you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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