There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
where are you?
Hypothermia
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
