i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I fill condoms, not promises.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
