i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.