I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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