We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
im holly from the hills drunk
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
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Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
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We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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