just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
