white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
All the doctor said was why
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
