Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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