I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I just had sex on a roof
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
