and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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