talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
wow bdsm is so cute
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
