worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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