I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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