Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
