worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
