Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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