Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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