He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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