well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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