Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
We got so high we made milksteak
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
