I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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