Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize