I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Randomize
