Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
