just come out here and I will go home with you...
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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