so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
