His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Floor bacon is actually really good
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
