we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
please don't ironically join a cult
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