saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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