So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Randomize
