Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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