I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize