did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize