glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
