absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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