do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
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