I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
