i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
