I don't usually arrange sex via text message
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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