We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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