just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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